Mom: *calls my name*
Me: *closes computer, gets up, opens door, walks downstairs, jumps through hoop of fire, fights muhammad ali in his prime, wrestles a bear, out runs usain bolt, climbs mount everest*
Mom: Hand me that thing literally 5 feet from where I'm sitting.
Me when I finally buy condoms my first time.
-places box of condoms on the counter-
Me: Gonna go have sex.
Me: With these.
Me: Ahhh yeahhhh
Me: -starts hip thrusting-
Cashier: Can you pay now?
My night has been made. :DD
Some girls will never become adequate wives. Smh.
Jeff just found out its physically possible to...
Lolol people actually have baby nipples under their normal nipples, wtf…